DISCOVERING MY TRAUMA...

I discovered in my early 20's that I suffered from emotional trauma, now my mum would argue that she did everything for me and I went without nothing etc. and yes she is right, that was the case, but this is where I speak about analysing and understanding YOUR child as their own individual, because you will then understand what it is they require in terms of nurturing. It isn't JUST about keeping a roof over your children's head, feeding them and clothing them and making sure they have everything the need and want externally. We all come with our own embedded strengths and weaknesses, so you can never raise no two people with the same parental style. For example, parents can have 5 children of different age groups and genders, however not all five can be treated the same as they are not built the same in character, just because they come from the same parents. Some may require more affection due to being more emotionally driven, some may be strong enough emotionally to be at peace in their own solitude so they require less attention and more stimulating activities, some may need more attention and guidance due to lack of leaderships skills and some may need to be left to grow independently as this is what helps them to learn life etc. This outlook will make you realise that it is important that we analyse individuals, because our own children can gain more knowledge and life experiences than us in the space of 10 years, than we have in 20+ years, so this shows you age has no barrier, your mind, body and soul will never experience life here on earth the way another has. Therefore, I think it is important that we understand, learning does not stop just because we become adults and feel like we have lived more number of years than someone else so we know more. We are still learning, experiencing and growing through various changes, there is no age barrier on life experiences and what individuals have to grow through… so realistically, we should still be seeking to learn from babies, toddlers, teenagers etc. because they may be able to see things and experience things from an angle you have never experienced before.

Everything happens for a reason, so being given the opportunity to create life should be seen as a blessing and a life experience, something that should not be wasted regardless of the circumstances. Restrictions and laws are put their externally to protect us yes, however we take steps in life that either birth a blessing or a lesson, which takes us closer to understanding our purpose here on earth. The saying ' it's not what you go through but what you grow through' is perfect for what I am trying to imply at this point. At the end of the day EVERYTHING we do has a meaning behind it, and the sooner we understand and accept this, will we be willing to accept 'what is', 'expect the unexpected' and respect another individual (whether your child,friend or stranger) as their own person.

IDENTIFYING TRAUMA...

I realised as a child I required more emotional support, as I am internally sensitive and empathetic towards others. I often expressed my emotional state in the form of anger and aggression, bottling up real feelings as this was a defence mechanism for me, often because crying and saying how you truly felt in a meaningful way was seen as 'soft', this is what I call being 'conditioned.' Your told how to feel, your compared to the next child or your told about an adults upbringing and what they got through, so that means you must deal with it the same way and get through it too. This type of conditioning comes from an adult who was also conditioned this way growing up as a child, so the cycle has continued for generations before us, and will continue, if at some point this cycle is not broken. You teach a child to keep quiet, put up and shut up when you ignore or dismiss their emotions. Sometimes this even teaches a child to speak through actions, causing them to become violent or disruptive.

Read the next Blog for more...

Feel free Share this blog post, comment, ask questions and share your views and experiences also.

Love and Light ~X~